[Ermine] Marriage....

Hi there!
Just a chuckle to start your Monday ;)

Ken Herrick

> >Subject: Words about marriage
> >
> > Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with
> > friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other
> > person has, you wish you had ordered that.
> >
> > ------------------------
> >
> > At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you
> > wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"
> > The other replied, "Yes, I am, I married the wrong man."
> >
> > ------------------------
> >
> > After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool

> > when I married you."
> > She replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > A lady inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Husband wanted." Next
> >day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing:
"You
> > can have mine."
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, "I've
> > found a man just like father!"
> > Her mother replied, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to

> > let her keep him.
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in
> > Europe. - Jackie Mason
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get
> > married?"
> > And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > Young Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a
> > man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?
> > Dad: That happens in every country, son.
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was

> > until I got married; and then it was too late."
> >
> > ----------------------
> >
> > A woman was telling her friend, "It is I who made my husband a
> > millionaire."
> > "And what was he before you married him?" asked the friend.
> > The woman replied, "A billionaire."
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never
> > get to prove it.
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second
> > marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every
> > word you say, talk in your sleep.
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life
> > thinking they had no faults at all.
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > You know the honeymoon is pretty much over when you start to go out
> > with the boys on Wednesday nights, and so does she.
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > Personally, I think one of the greatest things about marriage is
> > that as both husband and father, I can say anything I want to around
he
> > house. Of course, no one pays the least bit of attention.>
> > ------------------------>
> > Husband: "Want a quickie?"
> > Wife: "As opposed to what?"
> >
> > -------------------------
> >
> > My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate. So I got two
> > girlfriends.
> >
> > -------------------------
> >
> > How do most men define marriage? A very expensive way to get your
> > laundry done free.
> >
> > -------------------------
> >
> > The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget

> > it once.
> >
> > -------------------------
> >
> > Words to live by: Do not argue with a spouse who is packing your
> > parachute.
> >
> > -------------------------
> >
> > First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
> > Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

>
>
>
>

--+---+---+---+---+---+---+---+---+---+--- From: "K. M. Herrick" <taliesin@concentric.net> --+---+---+---+---+---+---+---+---+---+--- Received on Mon Aug 3 10:39:26 1998